Ovulation anyone?: My first ovulation after Bee Fertile regimen

So, this cycle is dramatically different than the last few since taking Bee Fertile. I'm fairly sure I have already ovulated or am about to. And dear readers, as you know I love to make lists, so get ready.

•  I got my first High on my CBEFM on Thursday, so I'm fairly certain I am at my Peak this weekend. I wasn't able to continue my CBEFM, so I can't say what it would've measured. 
• Also, have had a lot of EWCM lately. 
• Seriously high sense of smell. But like usual it comes and goes.
• I also have an increased sense of taste to go along with that. Some things taste awful that I know I like. 
• Frequent need to urinate--I don't know if I am drinking more liquid and how this connects to it, but I get the familiar feeling of needing to more often.
• Breast Tenderness--mostly nipples, sometimes the sides. This has been coming on since Monday or Tuesday. It's much stronger than it has been in the anovulatory cycles.
• Fatigue/Trouble sleeping--I put these together because I don't know if the fatigue is due to the trouble sleeping or exacerbated by it. I've had at least 2-3 nights this week of difficulty falling asleep, waking early, or restless sleep. 
• Bloating in the last two days.
• I had a high temp yesterday, but I discarded it because I woke really early and had restless sleep.

These are classic ovulation signs for me; I don't know if they are so strong now due to not ovulating lately, or some changes in my hormone levels due to the Bee Fertile. I guess we'll wait and see!

Diagnosis: Hypothyroidism

Well. I got a letter from my doctor, who I saw around mid-March. She did a CBC (complete blood count), cholesterol screen and a hormone panel. My cholesterol is good, no problems with blood sugar, prolactin is normal. However.....

My blood test indicates I have hypothyroidism (lower than normal production of thyroid hormones).  My doctor's letter did not indicate the numbers, but I did appreciate how her letter explained it to me in normal English with minimal doctor-speak. But, the letter indicated she was including a prescription for Synthroid (25 mcg), but the nurse must've forgotten to put it in the envelope. Needless to say, I was beyond frustrated. I thought that maybe she had called it in to the pharmacy instead, and had my DH go by and see. He said the pharmacy tech looked at him like he was an idiot. I had to get the letter TWO WEEKS after it was dated, on  a Friday, and of course I can't even leave a message for the doctor until Monday.

My first cycle on Bee Fertile

So, yesterday, AF showed, making my nephew's 1st birthday CD1. *sigh* Anyhow, time to analyze my first cycle on Bee Fertile!  So, overall, I would say that my PMS symptoms after O were more stable and increased intensity.

Previous cycles, a symptom like, tender breasts would be very tender one day, less tender the next, and then increase in intensity.

What does it mean when your cycle is messed up?

That is what I ask myself. Yes, cycle's change. You can have a consistent pattern six cycles in a row, and just when you seem to have identified the pattern, it changes. If ONLY for that one cycle. Just to show you that you can't ever be definite when it comes to your body.  I don't know how many times I've seen posts on forums or pregnancy sites claiming that "royal jelly messed up my cycle!" Replace the underlined word with the newest supplement to be touted as the infertility cure. I've seen it said about Soy Isoflavones, Vitex (chasteberry), and any number of other blends or new supplements.

Here is the cold hard truth. These supplements are supposed to make your cycle change. Yeah. I said it.

When something changes that is good, we sigh in relief or jump for joy and think, "Yes! It worked" or something to that effect. When something changes that is not what we were hoping for or expecting, it messed it up or didn't work.  After 3 years of attempting to conceive successfully, I will admit that many (ok, most) of the times that my cycle took a drastic turn, I was moaning and complaining with the rest of my TTC pals. But later, because hindsight is 20/20, I saw how perhaps these changes, although not the immediate miracle I was longing for, these changes are what just might push me towards that happy ending in the form of a healthier cycle.

The first time I tried Royal Jelly, I loathed the increase in PMS symptoms AFTER AF, that made me insanely paranoid that I had actually become pregnant but was having early bleeding. Which when you think about it, isn't a great sign anyway. BUT, one thing I did notice about my flow, was it turned from dark and clotty, to thin, bright red. Almost really EWCM with blood. And from what I've read, a bright red, non-clotty flow is a healthy one. So, although it was inaugurated by some killer cramps, the likes of which I had not seen since my teen years, I took this as a sign I was headed in the right direction.

So to sum up the good things that happened when my cycle "messed up":

1. Healthier, cleaner flow
2. Symptoms more similar to adolescence, which let's face it, are generally more fertile than your 30's . 
3. Lengthening of LP to just around 11-12 consistently. Also, spotting before AF is now negligible, and sometimes absent.

So, I recognized a temp pattern in my early pre-O temps. Around 5-7 days after a "false O" that occurs about the 2nd week of my cycle (CD's 7-12), I get my true O. I have to say what was most frustrating to me was my CBEFM! After 2 lows, I just kept getting Highs. And 3 days after FF gave me cross hairs, still only High! I will say though, that looking at the sticks, they've read closer to lows that I've had in the past. The closest to a Peak was about 3 days before FF said I O'd, where both lines were present, but quite faint. 

Yet, here is my chart today. 

9 days later I get my O. 2 days past the longest stretch between my "false O" and true O. Plus no High on my CBEFM. But as you can see, my clear Fall-back rise pattern, which has only failed me a few times. So I'm sold. Goodbye CBEFM, I might give you ONE more shot next cycle. But did the Bee Fertile "mess up" this cycle? Not really. Because in order to fix something, sometimes you have rebuild it piece by piece. Lay the foundation, shift a few things here, add some things there, and eventually, your building is functioning more effectively. But it takes time, and sometimes it won't work right away. 

Besides, if you read the literature on Bee Fertile, it is not claiming a quick fix. It lets you know that it becomes most effective after 3 cycles. If you get knocked up in cycle 1 or 2, you're just lucky!  I hope I get that luck!

Disclaimer: Although the Bee Fertile supplements were provided to me at no charge, all opinions are my own. Trust me, I 'll give you the good, bad and in-between with an un-varnished eye!

Stupid craving! And other ways I convince myself I'm pregnant on my period.

Cravings. They get us every time. Many women have the traditional chocolate or potato chip craving (or chocolate covered potato chips, nom nom nom). For me, it is usually fried food. Often I will crave crab rangoon, my fave guilty pleasure at Chinese restaurants. This was mostly when I lived near a Chinese restaurant that I would pass every day on my way to work. Sometimes it's anything fried, and sometimes only the thing I crave will satisfy. Lately, I've been so off sweets when I'm not on my LP/AF, that it is only in my TWW or on my period that I actually enjoy chocolate or really sweet stuff.

The point of this, is that for some reason this LP, my body decided to give me a yen for ice cream sandwiches. Just the plain vanilla, ice cream sandwich. My mouth just started watering at the thought. And because this, and other symptoms have carried over OR increased into my period, I keep getting that niggling thought that says--"Maybe you're pregnant! Your flow is so light, it could be a really heavy IB. Remember your friend had that happen!" So let's look at the "I'm pregnant" vs. "I'm on my period" arguments.

For formatting sake, we'll start with:

Reasons I believe I am pregnant:

1. Continued, specific cravings for ONE sweet thing, while detesting all other sweets.
2. Loss of appetite/get full fast--I just don't want much. 
3. Fatigue/exhaustion
4. Flow is still on the lighter side. AF was later than I thought, and it takes a whole day to fill my menstrual cup.
5. Some heartburn at night (although I have IBS, this is a more uncommon symptom for me), as well as  small moments of nausea. Fleeting really.
6. Moments of boob pain and especially sharp pain in glands in the back of my arms.
7. Still have a frequent urge to pee.

Reasons why I'm on my period:

1. Craving something in particular is a VERY common period symptom for me.
2. Appetite change I am experiencing is very likely the result of the RJ and Bee Fertile Supplements
1. RJ often gives me loss of appetite, especially at first
2. Vitex/Chasteberry can  exacerbate my depression, often first seen through appetite changes, such as loss of appetite.
3. Fatigue--where to start?
1. Recently ill, unable to get adequate rest this weekend, went to bed late past 3 nights. 
2. Vitex--often causes fatigue as part of worsening potential depressive symptoms
4. Flow is still heavy enough to be my period. I've had recent cycles with varying flow. Also, not even a hint of  a positive on my pregnancy tests 2 days into my period (yes, you read it right, after)
5. I ate a LOT of junk food this weekend and some spicy. Heartburn has been quite light too. IBS is all funky, so, could be just that. Plus I have some weird painful pit in my stomach--I hope I don't have an ulcer. 
6. The logical explanation is that after my initial dip in progesterone, the remaining amount filtering out as my estrogen rises is continuing the occasional boob soreness and gland pain. Also, the RJ might be causing this, as I remember having early boob soreness lasting well into my period.
7. For 12 months now, my symptoms seem to intensify and/or change well into my period. I should know this is my pattern now.

Despite all of the 7 excellent and sensible reasons I have listed supporting that this is JUST another AF, I still have an urge to test. Because my last BFN was using afternoon urine. I guess we'll see what I do tomorrow!


Disclaimer: These supplements were provided to me at no cost, but all opinions are my own. Believe me, I will give you the good, bad, and in-between with an unvarnished eye.

Current cycle status and vitamin regimen

So, since I am not charting, OPKing, or doing really anything to track my cycle most of this is a guesstimate. I would say the only thing I am really doing is marking when my period arrives on my phone's calendar and when it is projected. Since I tend toward 30 day cycles, I am estimating to get my period this cycle on 11/25/11--Thanksgiving, AGAIN. I only hope that it is much less painful than last Thanksgivings. Still, I am about 4 days away from my expected period--still no spotting, but I could still get it as close as 2 days before.

I really am trying not to obsess about my cycles, but when my BBs hurt so much, and I know that I've ovulated....I can't help but wait and wonder. I only keep track of when to expect my period so I can know if it is late. I try not to obsess about whether or not I am...I tend to despair that I will never get pregnant naturally.  I did have some spotting about a week ago for 2-3 days..not much...could have been O-spotting. Time will tell. 

I'm also out of supplements. I need to get my Royal Jelly, B-Complex and Folic Acid replaced. I've been out for awhile. Other than that I'm going back on my Melaleuca Vitality 4 vitamins since when I added that to my regimen last time I had such a long luteal phase. So I really believe in those. 

Hopefully I'll be able to get some soon. 

4DPO today!

Ok, so I know I have not been sharing much with you guys lately. I really need to jump back on my blogging bandwagon, because it is fun! So, this cycle in summary, I had 2 days of potential BD in the fertile cycle, one of which was the day after O, so it might as well not count, the chances are that low.  The other was about 4 days before O, so not great chances there either.

However, still a chance. And what is encouraging to me is that I do think I have finally had a picture perfect cycle. Now if only it will get me my picture perfect BFP! I've had such classic CM progression. It went from dry to sticky to watery/creamy to EWCM....and I had at least FOUR days of EWCM!!! The one BD before O was also on the 1st day of EWCM. Also, I checked my cervix this cycle and I got a very high soft, medium open cervix the day or two before O.

Then, the day after I O'd I went from swimming in EWCM to dry by the end of the day! It was magical. And my temps! They have NOT been their usual pattern, but in this case I think it is good. My pre-O temps have gotten back in the low 97s like they did right around my pregnancy last July (2010). And my post-O instead of slowly climbing up, I had one spike of .7 on 1DPO, then another .5 on 2 DPO....I didn't get my fall-back temp until today!!!

So, here's my 4 DPO update for today!

So, 4DPO--
As traditional with me, symptoms are more severe in the evening. Most notable are dull aching/cramping in pelvis--not quite like AF, although today's were a bit stronger. Sometimes I just can't tell if it's constipation or actual cramping though.  Metallic taste in the mouth is continuing.And spotting that's not-quite-spotting....it was very scant and more like a brownish watery residue....not my usual at all. Temp went down slightly...I guess I'll call that my fall-back. I've had one as late as 5 DPO, but this one was slight--only .2 degrees. 
Mood---don't get me started, let's go with Moody. Although to be honest, I"m just pulling out of a depressed mood, and so a lot of it is that more than anything. I'm fine most of the day then get into a sullen mood with DH because he kept criticizing my choice of steak for the party.  He's just SO particular, but I was trying to save MONEY! Which he's always harping on! Anyway, he finally confronted me with an apology for his surly mood earlier (we were both gems today). Then I had to explain to him what about his behavior I found so upsetting. Not so much the surliness, but constant criticism when I do things FOR him. 
Ok, still not quite over that one I see. He did apologize and we made up, but not before I became a crying mess! 

This cycle so far...

I apologize readers for neglecting this blog so. I have been busy...looking for work, keeping house, unpacking, etc. So, I haven't been temping at a regular time every morning and it's making my temps a bit screwy. After adjusting one and leaving the rest, FF has settled on an O date for me. That makes me 8DPO today.

This cycle my BBs have been VERY sore. I decided to start rating it on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being worst pain. The last few days it has ranged from 6-8 in pain. And I was very tired the last two days, with pelvic cramps.

Today, my BB pain lowered to about 5-6. Fatigue was much less. Who knows. I started seeing some signs of spotting, so that may pick up in a day or two. If I haven't gotten full-fledged AF by Thursday I might test. I don't think I am pregnant, it's just strange symptoms for me.